You know you are too old to play when;

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  • Walker
    MCB Member
    • Jul 2020
    • 1530
    • WA State

    #1

    You know you are too old to play when;

    You buy an old paintball gun, knowing it will need a LOT of tender loving care before it can see the field again.

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    You remove all parts you can, and boil the rest to loosen up the internals and remove some of the years worth of gunk so you can get it all the way apart.

    You put all parts in zip-locks and label them (because you are old and KNOW you will forget exactly what they are).

    Order seals and parts from two different sources, and sit back and wait for them to arrive. All the time being glad that you had labeled the zip-locks.

    Parts arrive, you sit down to clean the pieces, dig out rotten orings, use some oil, rust remover, steel wool, and wet/dry sandpaper to get all the parts to work together again.

    Get to the point where you can put the hammer back in, reach for the zip-lock, and find: No hammer! WTF? Where did that go? There had to have been one in the gun, since you have everything that would have connected to it and you can see it in the sellers pix.

    You start the old person recovery procedure; Check everything!

    Clean out and check the toolbox. Nope, not there... Toolbox now reorganized...

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    Check all the parts bins. Nope, not there.... Bins cleaned and sorted now...

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    Check the floor and surrounding area (cats will remove anything, especially if its in a zip-lock). Nothing... Floor is cleaned... Ran the magnet over it for grins, found a safety spring and bearing for a Sheridan... Score!

    Check the trash bin. Nope... Trash now emptied...

    Figure it's time to give it up for another day, get a beer, start putting parts back in zip-locks, tools back in their place, and remember that somewhere in recent memory you came across something resembling a paintball gun hammer. It was someplace that you would not expect to find paintball related parts, so I looked at it, and left it where it was. It must have been put there for a reason.

    Got another beer (its now 1:30am) and started checking other areas, outside the workroom.
    - Credenza (wallet, keys, sunglasses), nope not there.
    - Bedside table, nope..
    - Junk drawer in the kitchen, nope...
    - Truck, nope....
    - Bathroom, nope.....
    - Gun safes, nope......
    - Garage workbenches (no paintball work done here), nope.......
    - Start on garage parts bins, nope........
    - Odd ball tool chest, check all drawers, nope.........
    - Main tool chest, check all drawers... Wait! WTF is that doing with the plumbing tools!

    Back to the workbench to check the parts drawings... Yep, that's the missing hammer.

    How it got in with the plumbing tools is beyond me. I don't remember doing any plumbing in the last few months, nor can I think of any reason I may have put it there.

    I'm glad I don't play much anymore. It's hard to remember which flag station I'm defending, or how to get back to the staging area. Let alone keep track of whether I removed the barrel sock (or put it on), filled my pods, and air, and am wearing the right color of tape.

    I'm getting old! Maybe that's why I always find one of the younger players with me on the field. I always thought they were looking to me for guidance, when all along they are keeping me safe...


    Walker
    (Living up to my name)
    (Card carrying member of the Old Farts Paintball Players Association (OFPPA). Where you wind up the day, with beer and Bengay.)
    Walkers Current Feedback
  • Meleager7
    MCB Member
    • Jul 2020
    • 2170
    • Ontario, Canada

    #2
    i know what happened! You were in the plumbing drawer looking for some teflon tape, or maybe pipe dope. You set the hammer down as you searched , and promptly forgot about it !
    '96 RF Mini Cocker, '95 RF Autococker, 68-Automag Classic, Banzai Splash Minimag, Gen-E Matrix, Shoebox Shocker 4x4, Montneel Z-1, Tippmann Pro-Carbine, Tippmann Mini-Lite, Tippmann Model-98, Tippmann 68-Special, Spyder .50 cal Opus/Opus-A , Tippmann .50 Cal Cronus , Gog Enmey .50 cal , Tippmann Vert ASA 68-Carbine, Bob Long Millennium, ICD Grey Green Marble Splash Alleycat Deluxe (runs liquid co2) , Halfblock 2K4 Prostock Autococker , 2K RF Sniper II

    Meleager7 Feedback: https://www.mcarterbrown.com/forum/b...ager7-feedback

    Mel Eager Productions, Paintball Videos: https://www.youtube.com/@meleagerproductions9082

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    • Walker
      Walker commented
      Editing a comment
      That is easily possible.....

    • CrowsFeast
      CrowsFeast commented
      Editing a comment
      My thought as well. It's part of why I have a separate roll of teflon tape and pipe dope in my paintball parts kit!
  • glaman5266
    MCB Life Member
    • Jul 2020
    • 1277
    • WI

    #3
    Look on the bright side. At least your bins are organized.

    This pales in comparison to what you posted, but-
    Last August I played airball for the first time in maybe 13 years. We were playing with self-equipped walk-ons who pretty obviously knew what they were doing. I was asking where they were all going... using the old air bunker names from the PSP era. They were all like "WTF is a carwash?"
    New Feedback

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    • scottieb
      scottieb commented
      Editing a comment
      Communication is harder with the young players today. Lol @ carwash. I experience the same. What do you mean you don't know which bunker is the dorito?

    • Magmoormaster
      Magmoormaster commented
      Editing a comment
      That's pretty funny!! I don't know how people in the modern world don't know dorito, though. That's still what everyone calles them.

    • glaman5266
      glaman5266 commented
      Editing a comment
      These kids weren’t even around for the Doritos 3-Ds.
  • Walker
    MCB Member
    • Jul 2020
    • 1530
    • WA State

    #4
    Some people use a GPS to find where they are going... I use it to find my way home.....
    Walkers Current Feedback

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    • MrKittyCatMeowFace
      MCB Member
      • Jul 2020
      • 2386
      • Glen Ellyn Illinois

      #5
      Man i do hope you are not to old to finish this build and get this ancient bird back on the field one last time. Would love to own this exact set up. Ogled at it on ebay forever.

      Comment

      • Walker
        MCB Member
        • Jul 2020
        • 1530
        • WA State

        #6
        It's back together, but I'll need some Co2 before I can see if it is going to seal up and fire. It was in pretty sad shape...

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        • MrKittyCatMeowFace
          MCB Member
          • Jul 2020
          • 2386
          • Glen Ellyn Illinois

          #7
          Originally posted by Walker
          It's back together, but I'll need some Co2 before I can see if it is going to seal up and fire. It was in pretty sad shape...

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          Could that tank be modded to be filled with hpa?

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          • Walker
            Walker commented
            Editing a comment
            you would need to swap the valve with a reg... And probably no more than 1800psi... The tank is dated 4/88...

          • SignOfZeta
            SignOfZeta commented
            Editing a comment
            HPA? In this masterpiece? Satanic. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
        • OpusX
          Still pumpin'
          • Jul 2020
          • 1448
          • KCMO

          #8
          ...when you start planing your moves on the likelyhood that you may fall for not getting to the bunker

          ...when you only play spots where you dont have to crouch/kneel

          ...when you stay at the home for 30-60 seconds after start to see where everyone else went and then just walk their flank
          Velcor will save us...

          Current MCB Feedback : https://www.mcarterbrown.com/forum/b...opusx-feedback
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          • Memornix
            Memornix commented
            Editing a comment
            Have you been watching me play again 😀
        • Trbo323
          MCB Member
          • Jul 2020
          • 6358
          • Vancouver WA

          #9
          I refuse to accept your are ever too old to play

          Sent from my motorola edge 5G UW (2021) using Tapatalk

          I use Tapatalk which does NOT display comments. If you want me to see it, make it a post not a comment.

          Feedback
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          • Jonnydread
            Jonnydread commented
            Editing a comment
            Yeah man there’s a 71 year old regular at OSG. He don’t move too fast but he still do the shooty

          • MrBarraclough
            MrBarraclough commented
            Editing a comment
            Twice since November I have played with a dude who is 80. And that's on an 18 acre woodsball field. He apparently plays every weekend, usually at his home field near Mandeville Louisiana, but once every month or two he'll drive over to the field where I happen to play. Nicest guy ever. Never runs, obviously. But he saunters around, directs traffic with the renters, and kind of coaches them (to the extent they have sense to listen). He'll also out snapshoot your ass in a heartbeat. Dude has got the kind of one ball accuracy you get from playing for 40 years. Wears faded, beat to death old jerseys that are older than most of the people at the field, but packs a CS2.

            Never got his name. Based on certain details, I am somewhat suspicious that he may in fact be Tom Cole's dad. [Edit: I got this both right and wrong. See below.]
            Last edited by MrBarraclough; 05-22-2022, 04:09 PM. Reason: I found out who the old dude was.

          • MrBarraclough
            MrBarraclough commented
            Editing a comment
            So I have learned who the elderly gentleman is, and found that my suspicion was both right and wrong. He is not Tom Cole's father, but he is indeed the person I heard described as the speaker's father during webcast commentary for the ICPL Sunshine State Classic from a few years ago. I just misattributed those statements to Tom Cole, who had been in and out of the broadcast booth with Matty Marshall during that event. The person describing his father on the webcast wasn't Tom Cole, it was Justin Owen from the Saberwolves, who had joined Matty to do some commentary between his team's games.

            The guy I had met at my local field is Pal Owen. I recently stumbled across a PBNation video about one of the earlier ICPL events from a few years ago and he appears in it, along with Justin and some of his grandchildren. I haven't seen him at our field in Mobile since January. I hope he is doing well and still slinging paint.
        • Jordan
          I. Am. Canadian. 🇨🇦
          • Jul 2020
          • 3475
          • Southern Ontario, Canada

          #10
          I spent an hour trying to find a 9oz tank buttstock that I knew I had, just couldn't remember where I'd seen it. Finally found it in the bottom of a tote under a Stingray gripframe and a couple of VL200s.

          Apparently I have a lot of junk.
          And God turned to Gabriel and said: “I shall create a land called Canada of outstanding natural beauty, with majestic mountains soaring with eagles, sparkling lakes abundant with bass and trout, forests full of elk and moose, and rivers stocked with salmon. I shall make the land rich in oil so the inhabitants prosper and call them Canadians, and they shall be praised as the friendliest of all people.”

          “But Lord,” asked Gabriel, “Is this not too generous to these Canadians?”

          And God replied, “Just wait and see the neighbors I shall inflict upon them."

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          • lhamilton1807
            Friends paint friends
            • Aug 2020
            • 1124
            • Oregon

            #11
            Originally posted by Jordan
            Apparently I have a lot of junk.
            This could describe most of the members here… I’m certainly guilty of this. Or so my wife says 😁
            Originally posted by Chuck E Ducky:
            “You don’t need a safety keep your booger hook on the bang switch.​“

            My Feedback Thread

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            • Chrisrook1
              Chrisrook1 commented
              Editing a comment
              I’m personally guilty of the, “no matter how well you label and pack, you won’t find that one part until A. 3 months have passed, B. More than a year has passed, or 3. After you buy a replacement.

            • XEMON
              XEMON commented
              Editing a comment
              The answer is #3!
          • Rolling Thunder 67
            Old Mech Warrior
            • Jul 2020
            • 216
            • Cobourg,Ontario,Canada

            #12
            All of the above, but mostly agree with Walker. I have done this scenario more then once and continue to do so.

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            • scottieb
              Member since 2004
              • Jul 2020
              • 3947
              • Lincoln, Nebraska

              #13
              When you get only one of two reactions from the players at the field:

              1. What is that?

              2. or laughs.
              FEEDBACK - https://www.mcarterbrown.com/forum/b...k-for-scottieb

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              • scottieb
                scottieb commented
                Editing a comment
                Yep. That too.

                "Sheridan?"
                "Indian Creek what?"

              • XEMON
                XEMON commented
                Editing a comment
                I had some mag feed guys asking me when will the ATS be released for retail :P

              • Dusty Bottoms
                Dusty Bottoms commented
                Editing a comment
                I had a couple teenage speedballer's tell me my Automag RT was really cool, but they didn't know what it was. They couldn't comprehend that it was as old as it is! I eliminated them a several times during the day to further their education.
            • Tarsun2
              Certified Post Whore
              • Jul 2020
              • 1015

              #14
              i have that issue now but in my early days my problems were a little different.

              night before a game, i would pour myself a drink and tell myself that im gunna take it easy and go to bed early...

              now somewhere between there and the morning of the game, i drank wayyy too much, decided it would be a good time to completely take my marker apart, grab another few drinks before re-assembly, take a break to "clear my head", pass out, and wake up still dressed on top of the covers. run to the guest room to see how far i got with re-assembly just to find i made ZERO progress. every screw, every roll pin, every o-ring still spread across the table...
              "ugh im never drinking again..."

              next weekend, one drink, relax, and bed early...

              rinse and repeat.


              that was a long time ago and for awhile now, ive been have having more sober days than drunk ones.
              i can understand the frustration.

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              • flyweightnate
                MCB Member
                • Jul 2020
                • 1851
                • Dallas, TX

                #15
                I find the issue is my gear, as often as myself. The neoprene just isn't quite the same as it used to be. Like the cartilage in my knees.
                Feedback
                www.PhrameworkDesigns.com < Nelspot, Sterling, and Phantom parts, plus the occasional big project.

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