This is fairly tongue-in-cheek, but the more I ponder this train-wreck of an idea, the more I giggle to myself, and the more I hope it gets traction.
Create a “league” of sorts ... the ABSURD PAINTBALL LEAGUE ... around the JT ER2 pump pistol. Yes, it’s kind of dreadful in its unaltered state, but there is a reason this burst into my mind like a tsunami of “why the heck not?”.
1. It’s a darn cheap little marker. What better place to start than with a darn cheap little marker? One that pretty much anyone can afford and actually works out of the box (at least at a basic level).
2. It’s humbling as heck. Maybe you can win a few games with your electro-B@$%! Marker, but with a ER2? Time to improve your moves and tactics, heroes.
3. It’s equalizing. If everyone on the field had to use an ER2, the game would change radically. Be it woods-ball, speed-ball, air-ball, or extreme [insert adjective] ball, using only ER2’s puts everyone on the same level (equipment-wise, anyway).
4. Fields and Groups could actually include the marker as part of the tourney entry fee. Again… it’s $30, and if everyone starts the day with a brand new (unopened) ER2 equipment is not an issue, and win-or-lose you get a highly modifiable marker out of the deal.
5. It creates a Noobie-friendly OpFor. No one, and I mean NO ONE is going to get lit up by a jerk with an ER2. Not gonna happen. Getting lit up and ground into the dirt by players with more experience and much more capable markers tends to turn people away from the sport. If a field is running ER2 events, they will likely have several regular players who can pick up their ER2 and play against the noobies. Speaking from my own experience, playing pump against new players with semis is actually a challenge, and a lot of fun.
6. JT would [poop] themselves if demand for these picked up beyond the Wal-Mart crowd.
Besides, when you give a Paintballer an ER2, you’re giving him a hobby-marker; one that will never be finished! These things are just a jumping off point for taking the art of shade-tree air-smithing to all new levels of absurdity. This platform's infinite mod-ability, of course, means there would be several general classes of ER2 paintball:
>BOX: unaltered ER2’s straight out of the box
>>12g
>>10 rd tube loaders
>>Limited Paint (30 balls – ‘cause that’s what comes in the package)
>STUPID (OPEN PUMP): Tweaked and tricked ER2’s
>>12g only
>>Hoppers or tubes
>>Limited Paint optional
>STOCK: ER2’s configured for Stock Play - With enough interest, maybe JT will make some ER2S markers again.
>>Insert your basic Stock-Class rules here
>>Limited Paint optional
>INSANE (OPEN PUMP): Seriously tweaked and tricked ER2’s
>>12g or CA
>>Hoppers or tubes
>>Limited paint optional
Field Leveling
Modified ER2's would have an advantage over BOX ER2's. And it is likely that in such a niche form of Paintball, teams would be uneven. To re-level the playing field, access to paint would be the handicapping mechanism.
The starting Paint Limit would be 50* balls per player on the smallest team.
Players using modified ER2's would be handicapped as follows
CA: 10 balls*
Hopper: 10 balls*
Replacement Barrel: 10 balls*
etc...
* These parameters are just SWAG (Scientific Wild @$$ Guess), and will need to be adapted with experience.
Yes, this is utterly absurd, but sometimes ya just have to go completely off the freaking rails and post something absolutely bizarre.
Create a “league” of sorts ... the ABSURD PAINTBALL LEAGUE ... around the JT ER2 pump pistol. Yes, it’s kind of dreadful in its unaltered state, but there is a reason this burst into my mind like a tsunami of “why the heck not?”.
1. It’s a darn cheap little marker. What better place to start than with a darn cheap little marker? One that pretty much anyone can afford and actually works out of the box (at least at a basic level).
2. It’s humbling as heck. Maybe you can win a few games with your electro-B@$%! Marker, but with a ER2? Time to improve your moves and tactics, heroes.
3. It’s equalizing. If everyone on the field had to use an ER2, the game would change radically. Be it woods-ball, speed-ball, air-ball, or extreme [insert adjective] ball, using only ER2’s puts everyone on the same level (equipment-wise, anyway).
4. Fields and Groups could actually include the marker as part of the tourney entry fee. Again… it’s $30, and if everyone starts the day with a brand new (unopened) ER2 equipment is not an issue, and win-or-lose you get a highly modifiable marker out of the deal.
5. It creates a Noobie-friendly OpFor. No one, and I mean NO ONE is going to get lit up by a jerk with an ER2. Not gonna happen. Getting lit up and ground into the dirt by players with more experience and much more capable markers tends to turn people away from the sport. If a field is running ER2 events, they will likely have several regular players who can pick up their ER2 and play against the noobies. Speaking from my own experience, playing pump against new players with semis is actually a challenge, and a lot of fun.
6. JT would [poop] themselves if demand for these picked up beyond the Wal-Mart crowd.
Besides, when you give a Paintballer an ER2, you’re giving him a hobby-marker; one that will never be finished! These things are just a jumping off point for taking the art of shade-tree air-smithing to all new levels of absurdity. This platform's infinite mod-ability, of course, means there would be several general classes of ER2 paintball:
>BOX: unaltered ER2’s straight out of the box
>>12g
>>10 rd tube loaders
>>Limited Paint (30 balls – ‘cause that’s what comes in the package)
>STUPID (OPEN PUMP): Tweaked and tricked ER2’s
>>12g only
>>Hoppers or tubes
>>Limited Paint optional
>STOCK: ER2’s configured for Stock Play - With enough interest, maybe JT will make some ER2S markers again.
>>Insert your basic Stock-Class rules here
>>Limited Paint optional
>INSANE (OPEN PUMP): Seriously tweaked and tricked ER2’s
>>12g or CA
>>Hoppers or tubes
>>Limited paint optional
Field Leveling
Modified ER2's would have an advantage over BOX ER2's. And it is likely that in such a niche form of Paintball, teams would be uneven. To re-level the playing field, access to paint would be the handicapping mechanism.
The starting Paint Limit would be 50* balls per player on the smallest team.
Players using modified ER2's would be handicapped as follows
CA: 10 balls*
Hopper: 10 balls*
Replacement Barrel: 10 balls*
etc...
* These parameters are just SWAG (Scientific Wild @$$ Guess), and will need to be adapted with experience.
Yes, this is utterly absurd, but sometimes ya just have to go completely off the freaking rails and post something absolutely bizarre.
... The Talon can't be used for BOX class, the Talon looks like it has a nicer pump handle, and that just wouldn't be fair.
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